It's been a long time since I met anyone from Chemical Engineering, or so I felt. Actually it was just a week since enrolment but enrolment wasn't exactly the most pleasant. Talking to Danzen made me feel like I was away from civilization for 7 years, maybe partly because I actually haven't talked to him for a long time - a few months, I guess - since he blonged to another block.
Anyway, we didn't even have a proper conversation; so much for friends. I asked about his vacation and their church and his subjects now and judo and future plans - I was listening and all even though I was doing my Duolingo routine - but when he asked me the same, I just couldn't answer. There's this problem with me wanting to hold a proper conversation when usually I just listen to people talk about their lives. I've been too affected by that book "How to Talk so People will Listen" which actually taught more on "How to Listen" than "How to Talk." Although I do talk a lot of nonsense when I'm in the mood - which I usually am - but they're all just small talk. People don't like it when you have big talk. Nobody likes to talk about their ideas and ideals. And by "talk" I mean not just saying things out loud and expecting the other to either agree wholeheartedly with a nod and a smile or disagree respectfully with a headshake and a smile. I mean "talking" to be something like writing an essay together; thinking and talking about a subject as if your two brains are joined together, slamming your ideals like a truck against the wall, seeing if it holds up to all sort of scrutiny. Nobody likes "big talk;" everyone just likes to listen to what they already belive in.
But though we hadn't had a proper conversation - I still think him a friend. I mean I can still sit comfortably and quietly with him around and do my Duolingo and really not be pressured to say anything yet acknowledge each other's presence. Okay, maybe I'm not comfortable enough to say "Je suis une mouche" out loud - I wouldn't have said it anyway, since we're in the library and all - but well he counts as a friend. Thing is, you can't really be sure if the other person thinks the same but it doesn't matter now. It'll show, sooner or later. I also met Joco but that was even less of a conversation. I hadn't much to say then and I don't have much to say now either.
I left the library 30 minutes before my one and only class today: CW 10 (Creative Writing 10). As I reached the third floor I kept thinking whether the room was CAL 310 or CAL 301, so upon reaching the top of the stairs I turned left as a force of habit and found CAL 310. There were people waiting outside an empty room and no one dares to go inside. Freshies don't dare to go inside an empty class room - that is, I would've easily guessed most of them were freshies if I were on my Sherlock mode but no, I was lost that day like I freshie. So I passed by that room and convinced myself that my room was actually CAL 301 and turned round the whole building, and I crossed the south side. Crossing the south side is a shameful thing to do in CAL, since it clearly shows you're lost and all those students going up and down the stairs could see that you're lost. Not that they actually looked, but anyway, it's still shameful.
So I went round the building and checked my Form 5 and returned to CAL 310, and finally someone had enough sense to actually enter the empty room. I didn't enter it first because I didn't want to be a pabida or anything; just attend class more or less incognito, maybe make a few friends along the way, but not flirt with girls - I don't do that anymore ever since she told me off - and definitely not a bida.
Well sir FLORES, EMIL FRANCIS (for all you teacher stalkers out there who want to get ratings for profs) is actually interesting and kind of funny, but he's one of those guys whose accent you need to get used to - unless, of course, you were brought up as an English speaker. I wasn't, but I'm not too bad at that and I say I can adjust more or less by next meeting. This first day of class he asked us to introduce ourselves and name a favorite fictional character. Everyone named someone the others don't know, as if it was a contest of hving your character unknown to others and show that you're a wide reader and all, which is supposedly cool. Honestly, I didn't really care about that, so I was just about to name Holden Caulfield from The Catcher in the Rye (book I was reading then; I finished it a few hours later) since you just can't not ignore that goddamn bastard. He sees things similarly to me and I mostly agree with him especially when he says that you can't really figure out girls and they make you crazy all that; only that he goddamn hates everything. I'm talking a bit like him now actually, my mind going off in all sorts of branches. It's natural, only that I now know how to express it. But I hadn't really finished the book so I can't really say what kind of person he was, so I thought of naming Hercule Poirot since I read The Labours of Hercules before that, but I wasn't too fond of him either so I just named Lawrence Wargrave from And Then There was None, which I read before the other one.
Wow, a long diary post. Something - someone is actually bothering me, but writing all this takes my mind off things. I mean, I can't really share it with anyone, can I? That's the very purpose of this public-private ranting media. That's all for today I guess.
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