Save me from trouble,
But not from sin.
Yes I need your forgiveness,
But don't make me clean.
Give me your blessings,
But spare me the discipline.
Be my friend, but not my king.
----------------------------------------------
Half-truths are the devil's lie
Saturday, November 22, 2014
Monday, November 10, 2014
The Purity Obsession
The influences of the sexual freedom remain decades beyond its supposed ‘death.’ In reality, it is not the movement that is so influential but the liberal train of thought of free love. I have already written to you about this, telling you when love is wrong, but this time I want to talk about the Christian obsession with purity, as if sex and relationships were impure.
There are various manifestations of this obsession ranging from a ban on physical contact such as kisses and holding hands and hugs, to making vows of completely staying out of a relationship for a period of time. While these vows spring from true and noble intentions (which are indeed admirable), sometimes a tinge of selfish irrationality has overrun this practice.
Why is it irrational? Because what works for one does not always work for everyone. It would be understandable if you were as weak as I, easily swayed by the demands of the flesh. In this case, it is truly better to cut off relationships and/or make extreme vows than to be tempted and so be unwarily led to sin. Otherwise, if God has graced you with enough self-control, then I see no reason to make such vows, unless it is something like a Nazirite vow. But the problem lies here: sometimes these vows are made either because of 1) fear of being hurt, or 2) desire for happiness.
And so the logic goes like this: “I’ll stay pure until God gives me the one so I’ll be happy <or some other kind of happiness, such as not being hurt>.” While there is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy (God loves it when we delight in Him), this noble practice has been reduced to a selfish bargaining with God.
First and foremost, I think that the obsession with a soulmate is pointless. Some say that the idea of soulmates are Greek in nature (Zeus splitting humans into two with lightning), there is also a Jewish concept of a soulmate, tied to predestination. Because God is sovereign over all, including relationships and marriages, soulmates are not in contrast with Scripture. But predestination is the least of our concern, for the secret things belong to the Lord.
Our business lies with what is revealed to us: 1) being pure (not staying pure, because no one is pure), and 2) our motives for doing so.
The pursuit of purity is not for happiness, but for the Glory. Whatever we do, we do for the Glory; happiness is merely secondary. Now this does not mean that being pure is a heart-wrenching sacrifice; on the contrary, Old Testament sacrifices are more or less sacred parties. As the psalmist declares, “In His right hand are pleasures forever more.” Happiness is inevitably included in the end, but it is not the main goal.
It is easy to say that we do things for God’s glory, but we all know that our motives do not change so easily. After all, our hearts are the main reason we are impure. The kingdom is not concerned with staying out of relationships and of kisses and holding hands but with worshipping the Father in Spirit and in truth. What a woman kisses does not make her unclean, and what a man touches does not make him unclean, but what occupies their mind.
How then, do we become pure? And if it is not just staying out of relationships and physical contact, then what is it? The apostle Paul writes to the Thessalonians: “control your bodies in a holy and honourable manner, not with passion and lust.” In view of this, I think that purity is simply being holy. This we can attain by the renewing of our mind through meditation in His word, that we many know not just who, but what God’s will is – what is proper, pleasing, and perfect in his sight.
And if this is purity, then by all means, let us be obsessed with it.
There are various manifestations of this obsession ranging from a ban on physical contact such as kisses and holding hands and hugs, to making vows of completely staying out of a relationship for a period of time. While these vows spring from true and noble intentions (which are indeed admirable), sometimes a tinge of selfish irrationality has overrun this practice.
Why is it irrational? Because what works for one does not always work for everyone. It would be understandable if you were as weak as I, easily swayed by the demands of the flesh. In this case, it is truly better to cut off relationships and/or make extreme vows than to be tempted and so be unwarily led to sin. Otherwise, if God has graced you with enough self-control, then I see no reason to make such vows, unless it is something like a Nazirite vow. But the problem lies here: sometimes these vows are made either because of 1) fear of being hurt, or 2) desire for happiness.
And so the logic goes like this: “I’ll stay pure until God gives me the one so I’ll be happy <or some other kind of happiness, such as not being hurt>.” While there is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy (God loves it when we delight in Him), this noble practice has been reduced to a selfish bargaining with God.
First and foremost, I think that the obsession with a soulmate is pointless. Some say that the idea of soulmates are Greek in nature (Zeus splitting humans into two with lightning), there is also a Jewish concept of a soulmate, tied to predestination. Because God is sovereign over all, including relationships and marriages, soulmates are not in contrast with Scripture. But predestination is the least of our concern, for the secret things belong to the Lord.
Our business lies with what is revealed to us: 1) being pure (not staying pure, because no one is pure), and 2) our motives for doing so.
The pursuit of purity is not for happiness, but for the Glory. Whatever we do, we do for the Glory; happiness is merely secondary. Now this does not mean that being pure is a heart-wrenching sacrifice; on the contrary, Old Testament sacrifices are more or less sacred parties. As the psalmist declares, “In His right hand are pleasures forever more.” Happiness is inevitably included in the end, but it is not the main goal.
It is easy to say that we do things for God’s glory, but we all know that our motives do not change so easily. After all, our hearts are the main reason we are impure. The kingdom is not concerned with staying out of relationships and of kisses and holding hands but with worshipping the Father in Spirit and in truth. What a woman kisses does not make her unclean, and what a man touches does not make him unclean, but what occupies their mind.
How then, do we become pure? And if it is not just staying out of relationships and physical contact, then what is it? The apostle Paul writes to the Thessalonians: “control your bodies in a holy and honourable manner, not with passion and lust.” In view of this, I think that purity is simply being holy. This we can attain by the renewing of our mind through meditation in His word, that we many know not just who, but what God’s will is – what is proper, pleasing, and perfect in his sight.
And if this is purity, then by all means, let us be obsessed with it.
Prayers Won’t Save You
Conversion has been reduced to a ritual of praying some version of the prayer of acceptance. While I do not doubt that many a good Christian have gone through this and that prayer is in fact a valid expression of the faith, I also believe that many, if not more, have been deceived and turned away by this practice.
This ritual has caused people to believe they are saved not because of God, but because they prayed, as if uttering some magic chant. That’s how it inadvertently looks like, or sometimes even how it’s intentionally made to look like. The meaning of conversion is to get a person to pray a prayer after making him understand some doctrine, and then shortly after assure them of eternal salvation. In this manner, whether intentionally or unintentionally, the end results shifts the object of saving faith from Christ to a mere powerless prayer.
Because of the emptiness of this ritual, many who have been forced or pressured at one point feel disdain and distrust in Christinaty as a whole. This makes them more averted to it, in addition to man’s natural awkward cringing reaction when talking about God, especially Christ. So although this method of conversion does some good, sometimes in some ways it actually does harm to others. It may also be seen in another way: this method does good despite doing harm to others. I will not decide which view is better. In either case, I feel a personal bias against it, and the way we view prayer in general.
Prayer has become a sort of magic, chant, ritual, wish, or sometimes a way to invoke the supposed power of optimism. But as far as I am concerned, I would agree with atheists that prayer is indeed powerless. It is this secret that many have denied. The truth is, prayers don’t change anything, but God does. Prayers can’t make miracles; God can. Prayers won’t save you; God will.
Now I don’t mean that we shouldn’t pray at all, because prayer is one of the means that God has ordained to shower us with blessings. These blessings many have already written about and I would like to skip that already. What I mean to say (and what I want you to remember) is that prayer is not in itself powerful; it only becomes powerful because of Christ. And so when we pray the sinner’s prayer or some version like it, it only becomes effective because God honours this expression of faith.
But prayer is not the only way to express faith. Each one has a different inclination in the moment of their conversion (which may not really be even a single moment at all). Some burst forth weeping, crying, laughing, singing, dancing, shouting, and other loud sounding gerunds. Others have it in a solemn epiphany or a quiet realization. There are those who simply decide to follow Christ, without any burst of emotion. And of course, there are those who pray.
It matters not, for the infinitely creative God made us differently, and He understands the language of each heart. And though true conversion is simple, it is never forced nor always defined by praying a powerless prayer; conversion simply means believing in the work of Christ.
This ritual has caused people to believe they are saved not because of God, but because they prayed, as if uttering some magic chant. That’s how it inadvertently looks like, or sometimes even how it’s intentionally made to look like. The meaning of conversion is to get a person to pray a prayer after making him understand some doctrine, and then shortly after assure them of eternal salvation. In this manner, whether intentionally or unintentionally, the end results shifts the object of saving faith from Christ to a mere powerless prayer.
Because of the emptiness of this ritual, many who have been forced or pressured at one point feel disdain and distrust in Christinaty as a whole. This makes them more averted to it, in addition to man’s natural awkward cringing reaction when talking about God, especially Christ. So although this method of conversion does some good, sometimes in some ways it actually does harm to others. It may also be seen in another way: this method does good despite doing harm to others. I will not decide which view is better. In either case, I feel a personal bias against it, and the way we view prayer in general.
Prayer has become a sort of magic, chant, ritual, wish, or sometimes a way to invoke the supposed power of optimism. But as far as I am concerned, I would agree with atheists that prayer is indeed powerless. It is this secret that many have denied. The truth is, prayers don’t change anything, but God does. Prayers can’t make miracles; God can. Prayers won’t save you; God will.
Now I don’t mean that we shouldn’t pray at all, because prayer is one of the means that God has ordained to shower us with blessings. These blessings many have already written about and I would like to skip that already. What I mean to say (and what I want you to remember) is that prayer is not in itself powerful; it only becomes powerful because of Christ. And so when we pray the sinner’s prayer or some version like it, it only becomes effective because God honours this expression of faith.
But prayer is not the only way to express faith. Each one has a different inclination in the moment of their conversion (which may not really be even a single moment at all). Some burst forth weeping, crying, laughing, singing, dancing, shouting, and other loud sounding gerunds. Others have it in a solemn epiphany or a quiet realization. There are those who simply decide to follow Christ, without any burst of emotion. And of course, there are those who pray.
It matters not, for the infinitely creative God made us differently, and He understands the language of each heart. And though true conversion is simple, it is never forced nor always defined by praying a powerless prayer; conversion simply means believing in the work of Christ.
Saturday, November 8, 2014
November 8 2014 Saturday
Today we are in Banahaw. Well, we did not trek Mt. Banahaw itself, but in the area nearby. Nonetheless, it was still quite the adventure.
This is the PI 100 fieldtrip (Life and Works of Rizal). It is more or less academic in nature. Officially, the aim is to meet the Rizalistas, experience their worship, and other technical words. But mostly it's just the first two.
First we visited their churches. The first church was from the Spiritual Filipino Catholic Church. It is very similar to the Roman Catholic church, where there is a center altar and two rows of benches. It was very small, around 10 steps wide with a seating capacity of maybe 50 cramped people. The architecture is that of an ark, copying from Noah.
Their apologetics are a hodgepodge of verses taken out of context. But that does not matter, because the appeal is to the natural logic and the Filipino tendency to be animistic and ritualistic.
Then we had lunch, and proceeded with the trek.
The trek was really fun. For someone like me who really likes trees and soil and water and rain (basically nature in general), in a way it feels at home. For five hours, we climbed mountains and descended steep slopes. We dipped in pools and bathed in waterfalls and squirmed in caves and slid down moss-coveree large, unhewn rocks and walked under the rain. The trails were well-defined, but they were still very difficult. Smoothened rocks were unable to wound, but are deadly slippery.
The sky was overcast, and the stars were completely out of sight. But the full golden moon still shines through brightly like a true queen of the night.
I'd like to detail this more but I'm rather sleepy now.
This is the PI 100 fieldtrip (Life and Works of Rizal). It is more or less academic in nature. Officially, the aim is to meet the Rizalistas, experience their worship, and other technical words. But mostly it's just the first two.
First we visited their churches. The first church was from the Spiritual Filipino Catholic Church. It is very similar to the Roman Catholic church, where there is a center altar and two rows of benches. It was very small, around 10 steps wide with a seating capacity of maybe 50 cramped people. The architecture is that of an ark, copying from Noah.
Their apologetics are a hodgepodge of verses taken out of context. But that does not matter, because the appeal is to the natural logic and the Filipino tendency to be animistic and ritualistic.
Then we had lunch, and proceeded with the trek.
The trek was really fun. For someone like me who really likes trees and soil and water and rain (basically nature in general), in a way it feels at home. For five hours, we climbed mountains and descended steep slopes. We dipped in pools and bathed in waterfalls and squirmed in caves and slid down moss-coveree large, unhewn rocks and walked under the rain. The trails were well-defined, but they were still very difficult. Smoothened rocks were unable to wound, but are deadly slippery.
The sky was overcast, and the stars were completely out of sight. But the full golden moon still shines through brightly like a true queen of the night.
I'd like to detail this more but I'm rather sleepy now.
Saturday, October 25, 2014
Thursday, October 23, 2014
October 23 2014 Thursday
Today the summer moon sets, yet the sun has not risen, and I am left alone in the darkness again. I enjoyed basking in that pale, gentle, white glow, thinking it would last forever. That was foolish of me, to hope for what I do not expect, forgetting that unfulfilled expectations become mere disappointments, but unfulfilled hopes become broken hearts. It seemed like just a short time, as if the passing of the summer moon across the night seemed like a shooting star. I wonder, are you feeling the same way too? Are you wondering why I never fought for you, why I never pursued you?
I could, but I won't, and I shouldn't. It's not like I'm your boyfriend already. And who will I fight against? If it was the devil, I would have fought for you with all my life. But the Word says, "Children, obey your parents." Will I fight against the Lord? It is not right for me to cause you to disobey our Lord.
Or do you not believe that God is good, that "all things work together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose?" Do you not know that this, too, is grace? Do you think that He who gave us the precious blood of Christ would spare any blessing for us? No, our good Lord will not withhold anything good from us. So if He withholds you from me, then it simply means that I am not good for you. It hurts a lot, but it is for the best for you and so I will willingly let you go.
So here is a last letter for you, if you ever come across this journal to read it.
I really, really like you. You are that someone I could easily be in love with. Every night I stayed up just to text you, every little conversation that made no sense, every smiley you sent, and every secret you shared somehow pushed me to like you more and more, to the point that even without seeing each other, I've grown to miss you so badly these past 4 days.
I really like you, but I'm not quite in love with you either. I haven't made that decision yet. I'm not like others who "fall" in love uncontrollably, who become enamored at the first sight of your beauty. I am not like the others who would weigh their options first and choose the best for them, picking the one that could make them happiest, thinking that they're in love with that one when really they're in love with themselves.
I am the kind of person who would have to consciously yet irrationally decide that "ah, this is the girl I love." And I do that, so that beyond seeing how beautiful you are when you cry or when you smile, beyond the times I'm leaning on you and you comforting me, beyond the romantic moments of our early years, I could still say "I love you anyway." I have to choose to love so that when you fall and trip in the mud and I see your soul in the ugliest that it can be, so that when we live our daily lives together without a spark or even with a coldness on our shoulders and in our hearts I could still sincerely say, "I love you anyway."
But not yet. I won't; Not now. I have told you before, didn't I? I can't court yet because I have no money. As silly as that may sound, I am serious about spending my own money for courtship, for I will not offer sacrifices that cost me nothing. But more than that, I am still immature and I don't want you to share my burden of killing Mr. Hyde. Lastly, the Lord has not given His answer and blessing regarding these matters, and that is reason enough.
Those few weeks seemed like they will last an eternity, but so did these last four days. I have learned again that while you are God's gift for this short happy while, no one can be my happiness forever, except Christ alone. I pray that you will also learn that too.
I'll be waiting. I will keep you in my prayers. Until next time, if the Lord wills.
I could, but I won't, and I shouldn't. It's not like I'm your boyfriend already. And who will I fight against? If it was the devil, I would have fought for you with all my life. But the Word says, "Children, obey your parents." Will I fight against the Lord? It is not right for me to cause you to disobey our Lord.
Or do you not believe that God is good, that "all things work together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose?" Do you not know that this, too, is grace? Do you think that He who gave us the precious blood of Christ would spare any blessing for us? No, our good Lord will not withhold anything good from us. So if He withholds you from me, then it simply means that I am not good for you. It hurts a lot, but it is for the best for you and so I will willingly let you go.
So here is a last letter for you, if you ever come across this journal to read it.
I really, really like you. You are that someone I could easily be in love with. Every night I stayed up just to text you, every little conversation that made no sense, every smiley you sent, and every secret you shared somehow pushed me to like you more and more, to the point that even without seeing each other, I've grown to miss you so badly these past 4 days.
I really like you, but I'm not quite in love with you either. I haven't made that decision yet. I'm not like others who "fall" in love uncontrollably, who become enamored at the first sight of your beauty. I am not like the others who would weigh their options first and choose the best for them, picking the one that could make them happiest, thinking that they're in love with that one when really they're in love with themselves.
I am the kind of person who would have to consciously yet irrationally decide that "ah, this is the girl I love." And I do that, so that beyond seeing how beautiful you are when you cry or when you smile, beyond the times I'm leaning on you and you comforting me, beyond the romantic moments of our early years, I could still say "I love you anyway." I have to choose to love so that when you fall and trip in the mud and I see your soul in the ugliest that it can be, so that when we live our daily lives together without a spark or even with a coldness on our shoulders and in our hearts I could still sincerely say, "I love you anyway."
But not yet. I won't; Not now. I have told you before, didn't I? I can't court yet because I have no money. As silly as that may sound, I am serious about spending my own money for courtship, for I will not offer sacrifices that cost me nothing. But more than that, I am still immature and I don't want you to share my burden of killing Mr. Hyde. Lastly, the Lord has not given His answer and blessing regarding these matters, and that is reason enough.
Those few weeks seemed like they will last an eternity, but so did these last four days. I have learned again that while you are God's gift for this short happy while, no one can be my happiness forever, except Christ alone. I pray that you will also learn that too.
I'll be waiting. I will keep you in my prayers. Until next time, if the Lord wills.
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
To You
This was originally posted in Facebook notes, viewable only to her.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Naalala mo pa ba?
Ang mga katangahan ko?
Ang mga masasayang panahon,
Na magkasama tayo?
Pero itinanggi kita sa harap nila.
At itinanggi ko rin sa sarili ko.
Ngayon, wala na.
Lipas na ang pag-ibig mo
Kung nagkaron man.
Hanggang ngayon hindi ko alam,
At baka hindi na kailanman.
Pero wala naman akong paki
Kung minahal mo nga ako o hindi
Dahil sa tanga kong ito,
At sa bagal ng puso ko,
Baliw pa rin ako sa'yo.
Bukas, sana
Wag mo akong kalimutan.
Kahit isang dagli lang
Sa bawat taon
Sana maalala mo
Na minsan sa buhay mo
May nagmahal sa'yong isang tanga.
Dahil hinding-hindi ko malilimutan
Na minsan sa buhay ko
Minahal kita.
Kung sa hinaharap
Pwede na maging tayo
At pwede pa maging tayo
At hindi na ako tanga
Baka pwede ring
Magsimula ng panibago.
Pangako
Hinding-hindi na kita itatanggi,
At hinding-hindi na'ko mag-aalangan
Sabihin sa kanila
At sabihin sa iyo
At sabihin sa sarili ko
Mahal kita.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Naalala mo pa ba?
Ang mga katangahan ko?
Ang mga masasayang panahon,
Na magkasama tayo?
Pero itinanggi kita sa harap nila.
At itinanggi ko rin sa sarili ko.
Ngayon, wala na.
Lipas na ang pag-ibig mo
Kung nagkaron man.
Hanggang ngayon hindi ko alam,
At baka hindi na kailanman.
Pero wala naman akong paki
Kung minahal mo nga ako o hindi
Dahil sa tanga kong ito,
At sa bagal ng puso ko,
Baliw pa rin ako sa'yo.
Bukas, sana
Wag mo akong kalimutan.
Kahit isang dagli lang
Sa bawat taon
Sana maalala mo
Na minsan sa buhay mo
May nagmahal sa'yong isang tanga.
Dahil hinding-hindi ko malilimutan
Na minsan sa buhay ko
Minahal kita.
Kung sa hinaharap
Pwede na maging tayo
At pwede pa maging tayo
At hindi na ako tanga
Baka pwede ring
Magsimula ng panibago.
Pangako
Hinding-hindi na kita itatanggi,
At hinding-hindi na'ko mag-aalangan
Sabihin sa kanila
At sabihin sa iyo
At sabihin sa sarili ko
Mahal kita.
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